Two Powerful Words to Calm Your Brain and Ease Pain

Have you ever noticed that sometimes you don’t even know what you’re feeling? You just know you don’t feel like yourself.

Maybe you’re missing your adult children. 
Maybe retirement isn’t what you expected.
Maybe you’re wondering what’s next, and you can’t quite put your finger on why you feel off.

Here’s something fascinating.

Neuroscientists have found that simply naming what you’re feeling can actually help calm the emotional center of your brain.

It starts with two words:

“I feel…”

Then fill in the blank.

“I feel lonely.”

“I feel disappointed.”

“I feel scared.”

“I feel guilty.”

“I feel overwhelmed.”

When we put a name to our feelings, the thinking part of our brain becomes more engaged, and the emotional alarm system begins to settle down. The situation hasn’t changed, but our brain responds differently. That’s one reason many people feel a little lighter after talking with someone they trust or writing in a journal.

One thing that’s important: don’t describe the situation. Name the emotion.

Instead of: “I miss my adult children.” Try: “I feel lonely.”

Instead of: “I don’t know what’s in store for me after retirement.” Try: “I feel uncertain.” Or “I feel afraid.”

Instead of: “I keep wondering if I did enough as a parent.” Try: “I feel regret.”

The more specific you can be, the better.

In my coaching program, YOUR Happy Second Half, I call this The Emotional Check-In.

BTW – For each lesson in the program, you receive four ways to absorb and incorporate the method into your life: 1) Short video lesson (all are 5 minutes or less), 2) downloadable pdf, 3) weekly group coaching, and 4) your private, personalized 1:1 sessions.

The Emotional Check-In is one of the simple practices I teach because most of us were never taught how to work with our emotions. We were taught to stay busy, be strong, and push through.

But pushing feelings away doesn’t make them disappear.

Sometimes the first step toward feeling better is simply stopping long enough to ask yourself:

What am I feeling right now?

Not what’s happening.
Not why.
Not how do I fix it.

Just…

What am I feeling?

Start with two words.

“I feel…”

Sometimes that’s enough to help you take a deep breath and respond instead of react.

These are the kinds of practical, research-backed tools we work on together inside YOUR Happy Second Half. Because the second half of life can become your happiest, most meaningful chapter yet.

I’d love to have you join us.